Have you ever had an “I suck” day? I have on many occasions. Just recently actually. I felt unorganised, there was so much happening (and it’s only April!), the kids were whingey about one thing or another, I hadn’t been able to exercise, the house felt like a pig-sty and I was just totally over all of it! I ranted and grunted as I moved through the house. My shoulders were hunched. I walked around with a face that would make a priest back off. I was fed up.
The reason for my “I suck” day is because I’m setting all these goals without actually realising it. Think about it – you have goals as a mum, as a wife, in your day job, as a friend. The list goes on. Life is also busy as hell no matter how you try to slow it down. Some weeks are busier than others but in today’s world life is generally busier than it was in our parent’s time. It’s just a fact we need to accept but something has to give or we end up missing out on what’s important.
As a mum, one of my goals is to try and give my children as many opportunities as I can. Take Taekwondo for example. They wanted to give it and try and did it for two years. They liked it but didn’t love it and yet we spent every waking Sunday morning at class (forget about sleep-ins). Or I’d stress trying to get them to class during the week after school while trying to work and get dinner ready so I didn’t have whinging hungry kids when we arrived back home. I was starting to resent it. The thoughts of the weekend would, at times, fill me with dread.
This year I decided enough was enough and I didn’t want to feel like I did last year. So I canned the activity. Where the kids upset? No. Do we have our Sundays back? Yes. Are we enjoying our weekends more? Yes. We’re able to go on adventures as a family for a half-day or a full-day, or stay home and drive each other nuts if we feel like it. It’s a small example but has made a massive difference to our family life (remember the saying “happy wife, happy life”…).
Another reason for an “I suck” day is our comparison to other people. I don’t believe we should compare ourselves to others but we do and it’s human nature. I do it. Quite a bit. And then give out to myself for doing it. All it does is set you up for failure. And it becomes one big reason to pull out the bar of chocolate you’ve been hiding and scoff the lot – and then complain that you’re putting weight on and look like a fat well-fed pig!
Just because the neighbour down the road appears to be sane and have well behaved, immaculate looking children doesn’t mean she hasn’t just spent one full whole ungodly hour fighting with the toddler to get their shoes on. I know the neighbours know me better through their windows when they hear me yelling at the kids to listen to what I asked them to do 10 minutes ago!
It’s okay to have an “I suck” day. It means we’re human. We’re just not super human. Think consciously about all the goals you’re setting. Write them down. Are they all a priority? Reset them and you might be surprised to find yourself a little less stressed and a reduction in “I suck” days 😊 I’m going to take a piece of my own advice and give it a try again.